Excerpts from Vol. 1

The following are randomly-chosen excerpts from each of my books. If you like these,  also check out some excerpts from Writings: Volume 2 and Volume 3.

Writings: Volume 1

(includes earliest work from high school, Fist To Kiss, and Wrong Side Of The Bed)
Flying not on a magic carpet
But on a musical note
Extended beyond the audible range of a dog
Then falling
Falling down as a melodic scale is being played
By a talented woman
And as the ground gets nearer
The music less clearer
Fading fast
How long will it last
Apparently not long at all
As the song ends gracefully
And the body is implanted into the ground
The song ends
But yet it begins now

*****
Look below, don’t turn away
I will look above
Yes I may go blind but
I see nothing but a cool, bright sun
I know you are searching
Searching for the one-winged dove
He’s down here
He’s in the sea
Shh… say nothing as I tiptoe across the surface
Gently, cautiously, gracefully
Silently
Come here, lonely bird
Allow me to let you fly again

*****
Around a warm campfire
On a long, gloomy beach
One would think this is a nirvana
In some ways, in weird ways it could be
But it isn’t
Morbid images, blurry and scalding
Appear for a few seconds, then vanish with the sun
Dark but not truly frightening
Strange melodies in the distance
Four figures around the fire
Cold, waiting for warmth
Begin singing an unknown tune
One begins to cry
Tears of joy and loneliness
Tears showing thought
Thinking about pride in a certain religion
She’s only nice to me because she wants me to “open the door”
She lost my respect
Times are gone, lost in time
I lie dead in a chair
You wouldn’t know

*****
No One Loves A Poet

No one loves a poet
They’re too depressing to be around
No one is used to their outlook on life
Pessimistic or promising
No one understands the pain a poet has gone through
In search of a lasting companion
No one really cares if a poet’s emotions are shattered
Because he gets too attached anyway
No one knows why a poet is so emotional
He himself doesn’t know why
No one watches a poet
Who observes the dysfunctional world around him
To later save in verse
No one understands his dreams
For dreams are all he has
No one will ever love a poet
Until sadly, he is dead

*****
You ok?
Yeah sure
Just sick of work, that’s all
Sick of the routine
Sick of sweating and smelling like a pig
Sick of thinking
Sick of heartbreak
Sick of letdowns and betrayal
Sick of your smoke in my face and lungs
Sick of this shit heat
Sick of lies
Sick of trying to get them to love me
Sick of dateless weekends
Sick of my surroundings
Sick of how often they disagree with me
Sick of how full of shit they are
Am I the only honest person on this planet
Sick of emotional games
Fuck it, you win
Sick of people not feeling the same
Sick of imperfection
Sick of coming home to no one
I’m sick of it all, friend
But hey, if you’re wondering if I’m ok
Of course

*****
Beach hotel
Me and a friend sitting on the patio
2nd floor
Overlooking the pool
Beautiful girl sitting on the edge
Black bikini
Dangling her feet in the water
Nice day
Hot sun but a nice breeze, 80 perhaps
We’re sitting there on the patio
He’s writing something
I keep telling him I’m going to go down there and tell her she’s pretty
He tells me he’d have so much respect for me if I did
Five long minutes pass and I steal a hundred glances
She looks up at us sometimes
Brushes the hair out of her face
Brushes it off to the side of her neck
She’s amazing
Probably 22, maybe 23
We’re just dumbfounded by her presence
Just sitting up there, silent
God we’re stupid
No guts
Ten minutes ago we were inside watching Steel Magnolias
Can you say loser
I wish we had a radio up here
Playing some mellow 311
Maybe catch her attention
Who are we kidding
We’re chickenshit
Actually we attempted confidence and personality, before
I saw these two pretty girls on a bench outside an hour ago
We walked by and I had the strangest urge to ask
How are you doing
One said
“Good”
Wow
A reaction
But now
Sitting up here
Looking below
We wonder
Is this the way it’s always going to be?

*****
Lately I’ve been wanting a kiss
But I always want that
It just seems that lately I want it more
I want to feel someone’s soft lips
I’ve always thought kisses are magical
They are more than magic
Kisses are on a level that brushes against the stars
I want to kiss someone
I want a beautiful girl to kiss
I want to feel how it feels again
I want this girl to have sweet breath
Unlike my last kiss
I want a girl to kiss for six months straight
Breathing through our noses
Feeding each other with our mouths so we can keep kissing
I want this
There is no one so kind

*****
I’m walking though the mall
Every 15 seconds
Another beautiful face passes me by
I stare at each one
They stare back
Our stares are not the same
Mine is of wonderment and admiration
Hers is of hate and insult
Insulted by someone like me
Admiring her beauty
Fuck you
Another face appears
The same reaction
Fuck you too
Another
This time she belongs to someone
I stare at them both
She gives me a disgusted look
He reads me
Smiles and walks away
My only thought at the moment
Some people just got it
Some don’t

*****
On a plane to Atlantic City
Window seat
Some pretty girl down a few rows
Perfect blonde hair
Well-defined cheekbones
Nice, cute nose
Brown eyes
Did you know I’ve been staring for 15 minutes already
Of course not
You’re in your own world
A world without me
Fine
That’s how you prefer it
What difference does it make
You’ll never know who I am
Or what I’m about
But still
I can’t stop staring
Wondering what my life would be like
With you in it
Caressing my skin
Holding me in the darkest hours
Telling me everything’s ok
Of course this is just me
Going psycho once again
Tormenting myself once again
Why do I do this myself
For 30 minutes now
You will never notice
So I deal with it
With this pen and notebook
I wonder what you would say
If I invited you over to read this
I wonder how you’d react
I hear the pilot say
“Please remain seated”
Yet another obstacle
In my quest for confidence

copyright 1990-2090 chris caulder / planet isolation publications. all rights reserved.