December 2015: Stuff I’m digging lately

The Walking Dead TV series

The Leftovers TV series

The movie “What If” (I’ve seen it like 15 times already)

Making a lot of hip-hop/beats (for friends, for myself, for business)

Walking to and from work

Documentaries (Richard Pryor, Elvis Costello, countless others)

Eating 95% clean after several months of eating garbage

Incense and candles, burned religiously


Black/flavored coffee

collecting small (11×14, 11×17 or 12×18) movie posters

2015 In Review

Man, has it been one weird-ass year.

Immediate thoughts:

  • I currently have pink eye, or some sort of eye infection in my left eye. It’s red as hell, and there’s a dull pain, somewhat… like a headache, behind it. I don’t know what the hell happened or why. But, it sucks.
  • I still fucking hate facebook. But I’ve met some great friends through it, including Mary Lou Lord, and Anna-Lynne Williams, formerly of the band Trespassers William. The whole site’s been a blessing and a curse. Currently I deactivated my account. Maybe I’ll re-join sometime in spring. I always get more shit done being OFF facebook, than on.
  • As mentioned in my last entry, some former roommates moved out, at my request, due to a major lifestyle incompatibility. I don’t talk to any of them anymore, even though I wish them all well. Since they moved out, my house has had a tremendous increase in peace, quiet, and tranquility, as I knew it would.
  • There was a major breakup that happened sometime in spring. I still hope I can work things out with this person, but at this current time, it’s not really looking too promising. I’ve made many mistakes, but I have corrected nearly all of them. But sometimes, it’s too little, too late.
  • I started a band with my longtime friend Patrick (as mentioned in the last entry). We have completed an album’s worth of songs, and we are currently trying to keep the band alive… past few months have birthed tension and conflict. I’m guilty of it, and so is he. So I’m hoping we can resolve stuff and really give the band a solid push in 2016. Several blogs have written about us, and quite favorably, so that’s exciting… and, it’s worth it to keep trying and moving forward.
  • My friend and relatively new roommate Cait and I have recorded a handful of songs together. It’s caused some major conflict in some areas of my life, but being as the project and progress makes me happy, and her, too, I can’t see myself giving up on it any time soon. I love making music with all sorts of people, and I will continue doing so as long as I live, because it makes me extremely happy, and basically the best version of myself. So, that’s pretty exciting.
  • The end of 2015 marks a full 17 months of therapy. I’m not ashamed to admit I speak with a therapist. There’s no shame in this. A lot of creative, intelligent, and sensitive people greatly benefit from speaking with a therapist. I’m not close to being done, and that’s ok. There’s a lot of shit to work through. Some sessions were extremely productive, and others were not. That’s the point, though. It’s gotta be done.

  • My job had a major change in spring, where taxes began coming out of my paycheck (for years, there were no taxes taken out). This was a severe blow to my finances, as that $300-400 per month was desperately needed. In addition to that, I lost nearly all of my private students. I’m hoping 2016 brings more students and more hours. We’ll see.
  • I started helping a guy produce a hip-hop album… a long-time dream of his, for about 25 years. We’re halfway done, and it sounds awesome. Every week, the guy comes out from Atlantic City (a two-hour drive, each way) to work with me for 6 hours straight. Thankfully, I get paid… and I’m really enjoying the project, so… this guy is definitely helping me stay afloat, and for that, I am insanely grateful.

I guess that’s about it… thank you for reading this….. I hope you are well, healthy, and happy, wherever you are, and whoever you are. Happy Holidays (Christmas, Hanukkah, whatever you celebrate). And, Happy New Year.

Chris Caulder